AbsurdMurmurs.com

I don’t mind window-lickers, but not window-lickers on the short bus.

noun. For outbound calls, she offers extentions to press or blandly states the number is not inservice. For incoming calls, she offers deals on drycleaning or satellite tv ( today I picked up the landline and she said: I’m sorry. I’m not sure what to think of that).

We got a new second hand mattress and box spring so we had to get rid of the old set. Where I’m from, rural Wisconsin, one would normally throw the old mattress in a ditch or burn it in the back forty. The city of St. Paul frowns on such disposal methods so we had to find a “recycling” place. Places that take old mattresses also only take cash. We tied the mattress and boxspring to the top of the Buick (not an actual Buick; a Cutlass with the stoic trappings of a Buick) and drove to the bank. This is near the capital buildings, so we took University Avenue. We drove passed the hotel furniture place where we got the mattress a few years ago, passed the weak attempt at genrification via stripmalls (don’t forget to play “spot-the-crackwhore” — there she is!) and into the Frogtown, the neighborhood of dualing Vietnamese Restaurants. After acquiring our cash, we admired the reflection of the Buick in the government buildings and drove into downtown St. Paul and wiggled around until we crossed the Wabasha Street bridge. Wabasha becomes Concord and the restaurants become Mexican. This is the west side. There are caves to visit when we don’t have a mattress on our car. We drove down Concord, which becomes one lane either way due to the other side being dug up. Railroad ties is what they are finding and putting on trucks. Then we turned left. Crossed some tracks. The first pole-shed/warehouse is iron, then wood, then down further is more of the consumer goods. The office of this recycling facility was plastered with framed photos of Ronald Reagan; young Reagan, Reagan on horseback, Reagan with Bush Sr, etc. There were also American flags, and photos of Jesus and fishing trips. We unloaded and leaned the mattress and boxspring up against other, older and more floral mattresses. Briefly, we watched the workers clammering around on the charred pile of chairs and tables and other artifacts of broken homes.
Then we had lunch.