http://absurdmurmurs.com Anecdotes and Alibis Sun, 06 Aug 2006 16:32:55 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en Side effect: apathy Antidote: polite handshaking http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/possible-side-effects-by-augusten-burroughs/ I've been hearing these rumors that it's suppose to be like 105 degrees all weekend. I planned to not really leave my apartment.This morning, I wake up and discover that not only do I not have much food (lime extract and green curry paste makes not a breakfast), i also ... http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/no-weird-shit-in-the-morning-please/ http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/east-st-paul/ http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/bar-fight/ http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/mrs-allegory/ 1a- a person who has recently become intelligent. 1b- a person who makes a vulgar display of their intelligence. http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/nouveau-intelligent/ We were gossiping about coworkers over dinner, coworkers who don't leave helpful notes in databases. Milo says, "perhaps its another example of feng shui illiterate." Yeah maybe, I not being familiar with feng shui applied to data entry. What he actually said was: functionally literate. Of course. http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/hear-what-2/ A couple days ago, we were doing our usual morning commute. We were stuck behind a slow-going Crown Victoria from the eighties. Milo says, "That car smells like it gets twelve miles to the gallon." Me, I reply, "Don't we all." We then tried to figure out an appropriate context ... http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/dude-you-smell-like-a-gas-guzzler/ For those interested in new construction, here's some easy steps to transforming marginal solid ground into profits. 1. Call it a wetland. 2. Parcel the land into 1/2 acre lots. Create a prairie pathway, linking the backyards, from the soil that was dug out for the homesites. 3. Price the lots at ... http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/how-to-sell-a-swamp/ I've picked and bitten my fingernails since I can remember. It bothers me and its rather compulsive. So when I saw in the community ed pamphlet that EFT or emotional freedom technique, promises to fix my bad habit, I thought I'd give it a go, I mean what do I ... http://absurdmurmurs.com/archives/a-supposedly-useful-thing-eft/